HW10: Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

SUMMARY, CONCLUSION, RECOMMENDATIONS

Summary

This paper has attempted to determine and provide the effects of social media to Filipino college students’ romantic relationships.

Descriptive research method was used for this study, wherein informations used are gathered from online articles and answers from the online survey provided.  The research findings are:

1. All of the classifications of social media has been the most commonly used medium of people on reaching out to others.  It is being used for the purpose of keeping their connection to each other.
2. Romantic relationships, on the other hand, would never be phased out of the picture – especially for Filipinos.  Traditions and cultures related to it are still being practiced and passed along from one generation to another.
3. Similar with previous researches, social media has been proved to be affecting the Filipino culture on romantic relationships – both positively and negatively – through the convenience that the former provides to its users.

Conclusions

Based on the findings of this study, the following conclusions are drawn:

1. Filipinos are sticking with their traditions and culture.  However, with change continuously being offered, traditions and culture are being affected, therefore changing the usual traditions giving it a modern touch.
2. Social media do sustain relationships, as long as it is just used for means of communication of each party. It shall not be used in excess of what it offers, otherwise it would destroy one’s romantic relationship.

Recommendations

After drawing the conclusions of the study, the research hereby make the following suggestions/recommendations:

1. People should still share their experiences on handling their relationships, especially with social media affecting it, so that many would be learning on it.  However, one should not broadcast everything. Experiences shared should only be minimal so that no party would be judged blindly by their social media friends or even by strangers who would be reading their posts or comments.
2. Life is pretty much easier with social media. Although, making an account on it should not interfere with one’s personal life.  One should still be able to balance his personal and internet-based life equally – or maybe more on personal. If not, social media could be running one’s life for him without even noticing.

HW9: Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

DISCUSSION

What have been the effect of social media to its users’ romantic relationships?

Definition and classifications of social media.

Social media is usually defined as a common platform wherein individuals and communities create and share common interests to one another.  It may also be known as a group of applications which is built, established, and operates within the internet to be used by netizens in creating and exchanging user-generated contents.

Nowadays, it is often used as the new means of communication.  Some people use social media as their way of shouting their minds out, as their way of expressing what they feel.  However, some may have over used the easy access that social medias provide which makes them experience its negative effects.

Social media are on different forms, such as forums, weblogs, podcast, social networks, and more.  However, social networking sites – or simply social networking – has been the most common of all social media’s forms.

How could have social media helped people?

     A. Positive Effects
According to previous studies made in the United States, it has been a fact that social media has caused multiple changes for its users in many different aspects.  The most common help that social media had for its users is the convenience that it serves to every user for them either communicate to their friends and relatives, or meet new set of people, or even both.

Interpersonal relationships became an easy thing to do with the help of social media.  With just a few clicks, communicating or expressing one’s self became easy. Making new friends are just chats away. A few common friends are the usual key to meeting new set of people.

As said, it is already given that communication is one of the most common benefit that social media can offer.  Convenient way of communicating to one’s family whom they haven’t seen in years, who are a number of islands away, or even those who are continents away from them.  However, as Filipinos, “family” does not only pertain to those whom they are related by blood, but also those who are merely close to them at heart.

Moreover, according to a book written by Naomi S. Baron, having an account on different types of social medias – and being ‘always on’ can have an impact on one’s personal relationship more than its impact on the written language.  It has been showed in a study conducted before that many people choose to communicate online since they have the choice on who to talk to and who to ignore.

     B. Negative Effects
Although, another research shows that social media may have a negative impact on students.  The result of the said research includes the effectiveness of students when he/she is doing a certain task with and without constant checking on their social media accounts.  The more times the student checks on his/her social media account, the more un-productive they become.

Many people also think that the use of social media should be made along-side personal interaction, otherwise, one will end up prioritizing social media more than anything else.  Also, in the survey made recently made for college students, most of the respondents answered that social media may be used to express one’s feelings towards another.  But some says doing such is inappropriate.

With most of the people today, it is not hard to cope up and adjust to every change that social media has to offer.  Probably because social media is no longer new to these users.  Even the changes it brings to the romantic relationships of many are still considered – although not that seriously.

Filipino Culture on Romantic Relationships: Then vs. Now

Filipinos are being known for being loving and caring to the people closest to their hearts.  However, in the rise of social media, relationships have not been an exception to the changes that social media has in-store.

     A. Then: Traditions and culture
Every Filipino have probably heard of the traditions and culture of the Philippines when it comes to romantic relationships – especially in courting. How years ago, men are more than willing to do anything just to win the heart of the woman that they love.

Those years sound to be the one of the sweetest.  Seeing a man exert so much effort just to prove his love to a woman could be the sweetest thing a woman could ever imagine, and a man could ever do.

However, stories have also been going around being passed from one generation to the other were heard by some people. Stories which are about the typical Filipina who takes her family’s opinions very seriously. Somewhat like just speaking out the decision of the whole family to her suitor.  But just like any other story, this is not applied to every girl who gets the chance to be courted. Other girls just consider their families opinions but would still decide for themselves.

As said, this tradition has been the sign of sincerity of a man towards a woman. Although, as years passed and changes occur, social media had also started making its way into people’s relationships.

     B. Now: With the help of social media
Relationships may start either through personal interactions, through social media or could even be through both. Not any of the three ways of starting a relationship ensures a long and lasting one, but all surely promises of happy times with the one you love.

Relationships which started from personal interactions are the usuals. A man proving his love to a woman, getting to know each other, or simply going out and have dinner or watch movies – these could possibly be one of the most memorable things that a man can offer or give to a woman.  However, with social media, everything had become so much easier.

Meeting new people have never been easier.  Even the way of communicating to a special someone was made easy by social media.  Snail mails, phone pals, and pen pals are some of the most used ways of communicating.  But not anymore.  Social networking and dating sites have been starting to take over the internet for people to meet another who could be the one that they have been long looking for – or maybe the one whom they would consider becoming their lifetime partner.

However, Filipinos probably adapted the American way of dating. Most Filipinos nowadays have not been taking their relationships as seriously as how their ancestors have. “Modern” Filipinos have been easily affected by what is served to them, thus, making their relationships easily affected by even the simplest misunderstanding.

But still, many are choosing the old-school way of courting. They say it is still the same old way of showing one’s sincerity to another.  Although, since social media have been in the scene for quite some time now, it is not totally ignored.  Some still take some time to “stalk” and get to know another.  Personal communication would still be the choice of many when it comes to expressing their feelings towards the other.  They say personal efforts look and sound more sincere rather than those done through social media.

Nevertheless, according to a survey made recently, most of the respondents – who are mostly teens – had a united idea of how relationships could be sustained.  According to them, trust, communication, honesty, love, understanding, and loyalty should be made and exercised by both parties for their relationship to last.

HW8: Go move and skip the drama. ;)

The drama of people who are experiencing heart aches are no longer new to any one who has a Facebook account.  So, being one of the many who has an account – and is a constant user – on Facebook, I have seen different types of dramas.

Anyways, as I am browsing through Facebook just to see the usual dramas on it, I decided to just find and do something worth more of my time.  I succeeded, and found an infographic article entitled “Social Media’s Effect on Romantic Relationships” by Diana Adams on Bit Rebels.

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I enjoyed reading the post. Well, I can think of two reasons why I enjoyed it: (1) it was infographical – which is not really a usual thing – and (2) funny but full of sense informations are indicated – no unnecessary dramas, just facts.

According to the article, social media now plays a role on relationship developments. In which I agree.  Maybe our generation would be the one who could really tell which is better – the traditional style or the modern style.  However, social media – especially Facebook – has been one of the most commonly used sites wherein people gather and share anything – even various comments on the simplest ideas – publicly.

Having an account on any social networking site allows one to share his/her life publicly to the world.  Even though he/she may say that his/her profile’s on private, his/her way of sharing things are still considered on public.  Moreover, these simple sharing of thoughts (or ideas) through social networks would be the way to meet their fate – their destiny.

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Many Americans – and now also Filipinos – have been signing up for accounts on dating sites to meet different people and be able to interact and/or meet someone whom they never thought would be a very important person in their lives.

According to the infographic of Ms. Adams, 30 million adults from the US have friends who found spouses and long-term partners online.  Although, social media does not only play a role on the beginning of each relationships.  It also takes part on break ups or even divorce of marriage.

As I have said, break ups and heart aches are the most common drama on Facebook.  I have many friends who are ranting on Facebook, and in the next minute have already changed their relationship status from “in a relationship” to “it’s complicated”.  Also, in the infographic that I have read, it says that some divorce lawyers have been checking or looking into Facebook for evidences to be used in the proceedings.  Also, stated in the infographic, social media is a divorce lawyer’s goldmine as described by Ms. Adams.

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As always, I believe that whatever result social media may cause to one’s relationship, it is dependent on the person’s decisions.  If he/she decided to make an account on social networking sites and post every little thing he/she does, then he/she must be whole-heartedly ready for the consequences that it may bring him/her – may it be good or bad.  He/she must have to deal with it and later on learn from his/her own experiences. :)

♥

HW7: It's just complicated.

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Have you had a fight with your boyfriend just because he found out that you talked to another guy through Facebook chat? Or you having a boyfriend goes out with some other guy who is not your boyfriend and vice versa? How about you going out with someone but is “not your boyfriend/girlfriend”? Well, yes, it’s complicated.

“It’s complicated” has been the new “trend” in terms of relationship status on Facebook nowadays.  I remember reading an article about this a few days ago. The article was entitled “Dating in the Philippines and the term ‘it’s complicated’”.  It was written by Panda B – the same writer of the previous article I have made a blog post about – in http://asianfriends.com.au/.

Her article was filled with funny – or atleast as how I see it – comments about the term “it’s complicated” being used by Filipinos to describe their relationship status.  She said that the trend of using this term as a description on one’s relationship status probably started with its use on Facebook.

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Panda B said that, “It was the typical answer of the people who are confused, unsure, bitter, and angry towards their or lack of their relationships. It is a fleeting, moving, and very fluid status as one would expect that the status would change in the next couple of days. Its shelf life is very determined to be living in a short span of time. The term may have satisfied the search for the label to go with what they feel regarding their relationships. And for Filipinos who are hopeless romantics, the “It’s complicated” seems to fit into their need.”
So much opinions from Panda B. Here goes mine. So, yes, I shall say that “it’s complicated” has now been in line with “single”, “in a relationship”, and “married”.  Many use this status – anyone who wishes may do so – in whatever way they want.  But with Filipinos, this status is most commonly used in describing their relationship status.

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Not being able to say out loud what you feel, Small fights which became a big issue just because of misunderstanding, or even right-love-at-the-wrong-time drama are the mostly used reasons for having a complicated relationship status.  But at the end of the day, it remains as just simply “single”, “in a relationship” or “married”.

Maybe “it’s complicated” will not have its ‘fame level’ lowered at the moment.  Not just yet.  Especially at this time when people have already placed this complicated status to a certain position on their minds.  How ‘bout you? What could you think of being “it’s complicated”? ;) ♥

HW6: Survey Report

To supplement my findings for my research paper, I have conducted a survey.  An online survey.  I asked my friends – and some of my relatives, too – who were all college students from different colleges/universities.  But as usual, it was not easy asking for a favor on ramdom people. I mean, on those who are not really close to you, right?

However, I have gathered twenty (20) respondents throughout the long weekend – starting Thursday until Sunday evening. As I have said, I made an online survey, and I did it through Google Drive.  It was an all-essay survey.  I had posted ten (10) questions, of which one (1) was just merely concerned with the gender of the respondent and the other nine (9) were related to either social media, romantic relationship, or the relation of both to each other.

Gender

Of the twenty respondents, seven (7) were male and the rest were female.  At first, my goal was to get equal numbers of respondents, but due to the lack of time, I decided to just deal with what I have gathered so far.  However, through the results, I have seen that the opinions of men differs from those of the women’s.  Although, it has been provided that all of the respondents have a common purpose for creating a social media account – to communicate and be kept in touch with their friends and relatives.

Three (3) of the questions were directly related to the effect of social media on romantic relationships, which are: (a) have you courted by (or have courted) someone with and without social media? What could be the difference?, (b) If you were to choose between courtship with or without social media, which would you choose? Why?, and (c) Do you think social media sustains (or destroys) romantic relationship? How?

Courting with or without social media

Most of my female respondents said that it is better to be courted the traditional way – or personally, at least – rather than be courted through social media. However, four out of the seven male respondents (about 57%) thinks that it is also better to court personally, for them to prove their sincerity in courting the girl that they like.

Moreover, four out of all the respondents (20%) would choose to be courted – or court – with the help of social media.  One say, social media may be a big help because most people tend to post their feelings on their social media accounts.  However, another said that “the help of social media would be fine as long as it would be more on communication rather than the courting itself”.  But still, at the end of the day, courting personally – or without social media – is still preferred over that of with the help of social media.

Social media sustains or destroys relationships

About 60% (12 out of 20 respondents), of which 10 are female and 2 are male, says that it depends on the couple whether social media would be a factor to sustain or destroy their relationship.  Of the 10 females, most of them pertains that social media would only be a help if it is used for constant communications, otherwise, it destroys.  However, both men who said that social media may sustain – but may also destroy – one’s relationship said that it just have to be used accordingly so that misunderstandings would be lessen.

Overall, my predictions are confirmed.  In the background of the survey that I wrote before, I have predicted that most would probably choose personal over that of with social media.  However, I have also seen for myself – as I have initially wanted – that social media really does not only provide negative effects to people, because most of my respondents are still being positively affected by social  media – especially with their relationships.

HW5: Actual Survey Questions

Here are the actual questions for my survey/interview:

1. Gender (Male/Female)
2. Do you have an account on any social networking site? Why did you make (or did not make) one? 
3. Have you met new friends - or anyone special - through social media? How did it helped?
4. Have you been courted (or have courted) by someone with and without social media? What could be the difference?
5. If you were to choose between courtship with or without social media, which would you choose? Why?
6. Do you think courting through social media helps? Why or why not? 
7. Should social media be used to express one's feelings? Why? 
8. What do you think is the best way of expressing your feelings? Why?
9. In your opinion, how can you sustain a relationship with your partner? 
10. Do you think courting through social media helps? Why or why not?

Please do take my survey. It would help a lot for my research study. The link is located at the right side of this page. Or you may simply click here. Thanks! ;)

HW4: Survey Cover Letter

November 21, 2012


Dear Respondent,


Good day! I am a student from the School of Accountancy and Business (SoAB) at Asia Pacific College.  I am currently conducting a research study entitled “Social Media: sustains or destroys Filipino college students’ romantic relationship”.  This study aims to provide the effect of social media on romantic relationship of Filipino college students.

Your participation will only involve answering a set of questions which I prepared.  It would only take a few minutes from your time.  You are voluntarily involved in the study, which allows you to stop at any time or not to participate at all.  I would not be including your name on the published results of the said study.  The said participation would not cost you anything except for your time in answering my questions, although the findings will provide knowledge concerning the effect of social media on Filipino college students' relationships.

For any questions or inquiries, you may freely send me a message or call me at (0917) 909-6607 or send an e-mail to melizza.delossantos@gmail.com.

By returning this questionnaire in the envelope provided, you are considered to be a participant in the above project.  If ever you would not be able to send your reply via mail, you may send your answers to my survey questions on melizza.delossantos@gmail.com with the subject “Survey Answers”.

Thank you for your consideration!



Sincerely,


Melizza Angela E. Delos Santos
SoAB student, Asia Pacific College

HW3: Communication, Trust and Respect

Have you seen documentaries about Filipinas meeting foreigners and ending up having a relationship with them? I love documentaries like that. I think, the last one I watched was featured in iWitness – a documentary show in GMA7. 

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The said episode was about the still existing post offices in the country today which is a bit risky since technology is mostly used.  If I am not mistaken, Howie Severino was the one who made that documentary. I really had to finish the story, maybe because I am really hooked with the topic – plus! I really like the way Howie Severino delivers every documentary that he makes.

Anyway, I was planning to watch the documentary again, but decided not to do so and do my homeworks instead.  I saw this article online.  It was about (and entitled) the Filipino-American relationships. The said article was made by Panda B of http://asianfriends.com.au/ which I think is her personal blog site.

Her site was about Asian cultures, of course, including Filipinos’. Moreover, she discussed in the said article the past – up to the present – ways of dating and committing into a relationship of a Filipino and an American to each other.  Also on how it eventually evolved from by simply sending snail mails and long distance phone calls into communicating through electronic mails and video calls in the present. She even indicated in her post the start of the Filipino-American generations, and even had the chance to state that not all Fil-Am relationships succeeded but some also had to end.

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However, I would not deal with the past. I will be focusing on the present, since this is really what will help me (I think).  I am very much aware that “penpals” and “phonepals” existed in the past. Since, a pen and a paper, or a telephone, would be the most convinient way of communicating then.  Although, Filipinos – being able to adapt to changes quite fast – were able to catch up and adapt the changes made by the coming of technology.

Technology serving us with things which made our lives so much easier – including ways of communicating to others.  Communication was made easy.  Also socialization.  Meeting new friends and keeping old ones by mere communication have never been easier.  I guess it goes the same with relationships.

Many Filipinas would be seen happily strolling around the mall with their American boyfriends, or vice versa.  Well, we may say that they met through common friends, but most probably most would think that they met somewhere online.  The internet, being a very big environment, kept people close; and Filipinos always had the hospitable and friendsly side which makes them more attractive (or somewhat like that) to others, especially foreigners.

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Did I already mentioned that Panda B also indicated in her post that “There were also stories of heart breaks caused by the Filipino-American relationships. These stories range from geographical difficulties to cultural differences to illlegal and even criminal acts done by both parties.” This maybe the most common used reason of why Fil-Am relationships would not work: long distance relationships, inability to adapt to each other’s culture or even unacceptable acts done by both parties.

Although, I think these also are reasons which cause typical Filipino-Filipino romantic relationships to end.  Except the adaptation of culture part, because both parties are Filipinos.  But, at the end of the day, it’s always about communication, trust and respect which make relationship work. Or maybe at least, for what I think.  I don’t think the way of communication and the distance matter, as long as each party listens to what the other has to say, respect their opinion and just love them as much. <3

HW2: Change is good.

Have you ever wondered how you could have lived when you were born in another year? Where, in that moment, you are a totally different person? Like what if you were the parent of your parents instead of you being their child?

A few weeks back, my sisters and I went to our cousin's place. We fondly call them (our cousins) our extended sisters. We spent overnight there watching the first season of The Vampire Diaries altogether.

The Vampire Diaries (cast)

In the show, the casts were trying to relate the past and the present. With them being "vampires," along with their ability to live endlessly, it was easy for them to relate the present with the past.

I was getting hooked with the show and I am about to finish its third season now. But it just made me think about so may "what if" questions.

While I was watching, and thinking of my what ifs, I decided to open google and search about Filipino's dating culture: how it had changed through the years, and how the changes affected the people.

I saw an article entitled "Filipino Dating Culture" by Rianne Hill Soriano, an eHow contributor on eHow. In her article, she wrote how Filipino's dating culture has changed through time.

My mom -- with my aunts and grandparents, too -- used to tell me stories on how dating was like many years ago. Well, I think dating then was sweeter and more sincere than now. And what I thought was a bit "strengthened" by Soriano's article.

Although I have observed a few similarities, it was not impossible to spot the period's differences:

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Filipinos have always been family oriented, then and now. Although then, whatever their family says matter and shall be followed, but now, family's opinion still matter but is not necessarily followed.

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Then, first dates were supposed to be made for both the girl & a boy to get to know each other. Now, first dates is not really for 'getting to know each other' but more on 'getting closer to your heart' or something -- this is made possible with social media on the side.

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Many years ago, courtship is a sign of a guy's sincerity to show his love to a girl by going to her house, exerting efforts to show the family of the girl that he's serious about being with their daughter. But in the present, social media has interfered courtship making many men not go to the girl's house to court her anymore.

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However, dating places and follow up dates, has mostly been constant through years. Malls, since it had theaters in it, had always been the favorite dating spot of people -- well, also parks.





Moreover, maybe we should consider that the style of dating, as a fact, has changed already. Specifically since the arrival of the foreign people in our country. However, I think this is not a bad idea at all. ♥

HW1: Survey Questions

This paper will be focusing on the effects of social media on Filipino college students’ romantic relationship, and will be entitled “Social Media: sustains or destroys Filipino College students’ relationship”. I have finished the first chapter – the introduction – of my research paper which includes background of the study, statement of the problem, significance of the study, scope and delimitation, materials and methodologies that I’m about to use during the study, and some important terms listed and defined which I am to use throughout the study.

Also, I have already started to gather informations.  Most of my current findings are from different articles online.  Some of them are the changes from the past up to the present, how social media can control a student’s life, publicity being helpful to relationships or not, and trust on one’s partner.

However, since most of my findings are based on another culture, I believe that these findings of mine are still not sufficient to cover up what I need for my research paper.  I think these are just the beginning, I am still searching for things which may further strengthen my paper, such as the specific effect of social media on Filipino college students' relationships, the "evolution" of Filipino culture related to romantic relationships.

One thing that I am considering for additional information is a survey or interview.  I am planning to let college students – either from the school I am attending to (APC) or outside - to take the said survey. I am also considering adults who are not yet married but are having romantic relationships and has used social media to affect their respective relationships.

In the survey, I will be asking the respondents for their gender and some other questions which are directly related to relationships and social media.  I chose these questions for two reasons. One, I wanted to sort out the opinion of men from women. And two, well, of course I chose direct-to-the-point questions so I would not be wasting the precious time of my respondents. (Hihi!) As I said, I am planning to let college students, and some adults, to take this survey so that I would know how most of them look at this – and also realize how broad minded each of them are. ;)

I hope this would help me with my research study.  Actually, I am also really doing this because I wanted to let myself think (and also see for myself) that not all romantic relationships are negatively affected by social media.  Well, I’m hoping for your little help. Thanks in advance!

♥

Trust is key.

Are you a constant user of Facebook or Twitter? Have you seen posts of "in love" people which sometimes you think are somewhat overrated? Have you seen two people who are like talking to each other by posting status updates of their own? Well, I did.

Sometimes, I feel like I am not comfortable with Facebook having so much drama from its users (or at least, my Facebook friends). Or maybe because I don't have a relationship that I could shout (or post) to everyone on Facebook. I am not really sure.

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While I am busy thinking of what I really am feeling -- if it was discomfort or envy -- with relationship-related posts on Facebook, I decided to look over random articles on Google about romantic relationship and social media, I bumped into (yes, bumped, as if I saw this while strolling around a mall. Haha!) an article written by Joann Pan entitled "How Social Media Helps Romantic Relationship Thrive" on a site called Mashable.

Her article was filled with tips on how to handle personal romantic relationships and social media at the same time without destroying any of the two -- or even either of the couple.  Over all the article, tips to sustain or propel "new and long term romantic relationships" are given for their readers.

As it says on the article, "When Done Right, Social Media is Like Glue." This statement by Miss Pan was supported by the opinion of a self-described internet geek, wife, and mother named Alexandra Samuel, PhD who believes that the internet sustains and builds relationships.

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I am totally agreeing on this one.  I think, it really is a matter of balance.  As many would say, "lahat ng sobra, masama." Being able to talk to your partner regarding your relationship.  After all, trust is the one which makes your relationship last.

Speaking of trust, there's a line in the article which says "however, romantic duos should showcase trust by avoiding cyber stalking at all costs," to which I agree.

I know some people -- some are my frineds, actually, who tend to stalk their partner's timeline. Maybe to see qwhat they were up to during their respective busy days. And, for my personal opinion, they are just looking for something to fight at.

At the end of the day, I still think that talking to your partner about your day -- with work or school -- would be the key to a long-lasting relationship.  Social media would be a help or not, but it always depends upon the couple's understandinhg and trust t each other.

♥

Outline of Research Paper

Social Media

• Effects of social media
• Effects of social media on it’s users
• Effects of social media on Filipino college students
• Effects of social media on Filipino college students’ relationships
• Effects of social media on Filipino college students’ romantic relationships

Social Media

I.                    Social Media

A.      Its definition

B.      Social Networking Sites as part of social media

II.                  Filipino’s Romantic Relationship

A.      Past vs. Present

B.      College students’ way of handling relationships

III.                Effects of social media on Filipino college students’ romantic relationships

Introduction (Draft)

CHAPTER 1

INTRODUCTION

A. Background of the Study

Social media can be defined as "interactive platforms via which individuals and communities create and share user-generated content”. Andreas Kaplan and Michael Haenlein define social media as "a group of Internet-based applications that build on the ideological and technological foundations of Web 2.0, and that allow the creation and exchange of user-generated content." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_media)

The best way to define social media is to break it down. Media is an instrument on communication, like a newspaper or a radio, so social media would be a social instrument of communication. (http://webtrends.about.com/od/web20/a/social-media.htm)

According to studies, the use of social media on a daily basis may affect the user’s way of interacting with people.  The common effect that researches would indicate is that people tend to indicate more on social media than on making moves in personal.  Different people handle different kinds of relationships their own way.

Currently, no one can totally say if social media consistently affects its users on a positive or a negative aspect.  Each user has their own side, and believes in their own perception.  It always depends on how they look onto things.  If they chose to look at anything on a lighter side, then maybe it would be a little less drama on their part.  However, if one chooses to look at everything on a negative aspect, then maybe mere use of social media affects him on his every decision.

Many definitions and words about social media and its effects are coming from different perspectives.  There may be some opinions which are almost alike with another, but at a certain point, there is always something which makes one opinion different from another.   On the same aspect, relationships such as family, friendly, professional, or romantic, are being handled and looked at from one’s own perspective. 

Filipinos are known for being caring and loving, especially to their partners – boyfrined/girlfriend or their spouses.  Back in the past, they are very much strict when it comes to courting a Filipina.  Many ways of courting are made by a guy to express his love and affection to a certain girl.

In Philippine culture, courtship is far more subdued and indirect unlike in some Western societies.  A man who is interested in courting a woman has to be discreet and friendly at first, in order not to be seen as too presko or mayabang (aggressive or too presumptuous). (http://www.seasite.niu.edu/Tagalog/love.htm)

Traditional style of Filipino dating is still said to be practiced in some rural and suburban areas.  But, the rise of social media may have influenced this notion.  Younger generation, including college students, are meeting and getting closer to new people through social media.  Facebook and Twitter, for example, had brought impact on different Filipino point of views.

This research paper aims to enhance the understanding of the readers about the effects of social media on Filipino college students’ romantic relationships.  It examines the different ways on how Filipino college students handle their relationships, with the help of social media, nowadays.


B. Statement of the Problem

This study aims to answer this question:

1. What has been the effect of social media on the romantic relationship of Filipino college students?

C. Significance of the Study

College Students.  This paper would also be able to help college students who may be experiencing things which may complicate their romantic relationships.  These students are mostly the ones who are starting up or may be sustaining a relationship, although are not very new on what social media can bring or give.  The researcher would like these students to learn on how to deal with romantic relationships  and non-stop use of social media all together without giving up as much as possible of either of the two.

Adults. Adults would also benefit from the study because thy are also users of social media, and they also have their respective romantic relationships on their own.  Also, the researcher believes that, through this study, adults who have children – who are currently studying in college – would be informed on how their children would be affected by social media and/or relationships, and let them help any other researcher on spreading information onto their kids.

Future Researchers.  The researcher believe that this paper would be helpful to future researchers who would like to do their research on any topic related to the one discussed in here.  This is because, this research paper could provide essential information and opinions which may serve as their guide for the development of their paper.


D. Scope and Delimitation

This study focuses on the effects of social media on the romantic relationships of Filipino college students.  But due to limited time, this study will no longer discuss the effects of social media on other personal relationships such as family and professional relationships.  This is only to give emphasis on the effect of social media on any romantic relationship of Filipino college students.  Also, as to social media, this would only give emphasis on social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and the like.

Moreover, the researcher believes that social media is still in its peak of fame in the modern day, and romantic relationships would neither be falling – especially with regard to Filipinos. Therefore, this study would likely be relevant up to the near future.  Aside from time constraint, the researcher also considered the number of resources which could be used during the study.  This is due to the number of resources available regarding social media and romantic relationships’ effect on each other.


E. Materials and Methodologies

This research employs a descriptive method since the researcher aims to describe and to discuss the effects of social media on the romantic relationship of Filipino college students.  Details used for the study were mostly from articles posted online.  In addition, a few college students who are currently enjoying both social media and their romantic relationships are interviewed to strengthen the findings of the study.


F. Definition of Terms

• Family Relationships - involve people to whom you are related in some way or the other.
• Friendly Relationships - Relations that we share with our friends, peers, fellow workers, and other acquaintances are termed as friendly relationships.
• Professional Relationships - Colleagues, clients, seniors, customers, and subordinates are some people with whom these relationships are likely to trigger off.
• Romantic Relationships - the most beautiful and rewarding yet complex relationship that one can indulge in.
• Social Networking - the grouping of individuals into specific groups, like small rural communities or a neighborhood subdivision.
• Courtship - an important part of Philippine tradition and culture; It is a trademark of Filipino women to first play hard-to-get during dating and courtship.

(Sources: http://lifestyle.iloveindia.com/lounge/types-of-relationships-12844.html | http://www.whatissocialnetworking.com/ | http://www.ehow.com/about_6720507_filipino-dating-culture.html#ixzz2ACdpOYvy)

I say this because I know.

Do you remember when your parents seem to tell the never-ending story of the happenings during the martial law. When our former president, Ferdinand Marcos, was known as the ruler of the country. From the stories of my parents and grandparents, it sounds like Mr. Marcos had the whole Philippines within the palm of his hands.

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As a college student, it has been a part of my daily routine to check on my phone and my social networking accounts on a daily basis – or whenever I am available to check on them. Well, I think everyone does. At least everyone whose close to me.

I found an article, during my usual daily surfing the internet hobby, by Jon Hurdle in a site called Reuters. His article's entitled “Social media can rule your life, college friend,” and is about how college students are affected with the use of social media.

College Friends (Credits to Mishal Ordoñez)

The article says about how a week-long blackout of social media made in Harrisburg University of Science and Technology affected a certain number of students chosen to be part of the experiment. Their conclusion on the said experiment seem to be that social media should be used alongside old-fashioned personal communication.

And, I totally agree. As always, I have always thought life should not revolve along social media alone. Being a student, and an adolescent, all these social media have been a part of my teenage-life. Maybe you have seen photos or quotations on Facebook which says something like, “90's babies are gonna be the last generation of kids who grew up playing with their friends on the streets.”

True, is it? Kids nowadays know more on technology-related games and stuffs, but only a few know how to play piko, patintero, tumbang preso, hide and seek, and every game made on the streets you may think of. These games are fun!

Mga Larong Pinoy

These games are not just games. These games make the best out of its players. Team work and sportsmanship are some of the best things that we learn from playing games with our friends – our childhood friends.

Mere friendship made or earned personally, I can say, is far better than those made or earned through social media. Although, social media may probably be a great help not to forget those whom you first new – or sometimes termed as your old friends.

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Social media being part of one's social life is , I think, the same with school related things. It is good to excel in school with your personal efforts. With personal efforts, I meant efforts made when studying with the help of your books and hand outs from your professors or things like that.

I'm not saying help from social media are not good, but well, you see, when you start opening cellular phones or opening social networking sites, you end up not concentrating on what you do – on studying. You get what I mean? I am not saying this out of what I read or what, I am saying this because I know. I am there. I know this from experience. ;)

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Publicity: Being Proud or Way of Making Things Worse?

Are you in a relationship? Or do you know someone who is? Do you think social media or certain networking sites can cause resentment within your or your friends' relationship?

To be clear, I am currently not in a relationship, but some of my friends are. I even know someone who – I think – makes everything up out of what she sees on Facebook. Well, I am over reacting, maybe not everything but most of it. Hihi.

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I was getting used to usual dramas on Facebook. Public expressions of hatred or anger towards their ex-boyfriends/girlfriends, “___ went single from in a relationship” statuses, statuses filled with sad faced-emoticons, and the likes. I tried searching on Google effects of how social media or certain networking sites affect romantic relationships.

The article that I saw was by Sara E in a forum site called Gather. Her post was entitled “Negative Effects of Social Networking On Relationships.” She was pointing out that social networking is not a good idea for people who are having a relationship. She even stated several ideas on how social networking impacts negatively on relationship, including:

1. It can cause resentment within a relationship.
2. It is used as a way to deal with or vent feelings.
3. It allows a place for personal information to be publicly shared.
4. It can easily cause jealousy within a relationship.
5. Excessive use of it can be a sign of internet addiction.
6. It can be a path to infidelity.
7. It can and will wreck a relationship.

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I think she has a point with these things. These are possible to happen. But I think, it is not that bad after all. It really depends on the partners' point of view; on how they look on things that affect their relationship.

As many say, trust and communication is the key to a good relationship. I don't think it only applies on romantic relationships, but to all types or kinds of relationships. You agree?

At the end of this article, I saw a comment from someone named Natasharose Rose. A part of her comment says, “... Putting everything in perspective, social networking sites are the least of our problems! Also, it's a personal decision to share your private information on a public forum, so if an individual doesn't like that their partner does that, then they should date someone who keeps their personal life to themselves. Very simple.”

I guess she's right. It is after all, the couple's relationship, and it should be them who should handle themselves.  I think they should have a talk, a serious one, which would open up all their issues to each other. They chose to be together, so why waste that choice with just a simple comment of another girl/boy on your partner's Facebook status, right?

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